Seen any good movies lately?

So, recently all my closest friends left town in the great post-finals exodus of 2009, leaving me alone with my thoughts. First, I played guitar by myself. I have only learned how to play guitar in the past few months, so doing this and singing alone in my room still sort of felt like work. It was like I was still practicing for a test, which, had a professor been present, probably would have earned me about a B minus.

The next thing I tried to entertain myself was refreshing Facebook incessantly despite the lack of new things to read and people to stalk. Then facebook encouraged me to do a series of silly top fives, surveys, and pointless games which could encompass a post all their own-and probably will in the future.

I quickly grew bored of that too, so I tried cooking and baking. My roommates were very grateful to come home to cookies, but I was still holed up in my room without human interaction.

So finally we come to the not-so-guilty pleasure part: Netflix.

Netflix is awesome. Not only can I receive awesome movies in the mail, which happen to be on a list so they know what I want next, I can also watch plenty of older, somewhat terrible movies any time I want on Netflix Instant Play! These are my new best friends.

So I understand that Netflix does not really seem like it counts since most people already like it. Au contraire. I used to think that nothing good could come of Netflix Instant Play. I mean, honestly, who is really dying to watch the entire series “Coach” on their computer? And was it not enough for me to see every Gene Autry and John Wayne movie with my grandmother as a child? Do I really need to rehash that through my internet connection? Soon, however, I realized that many of my not-so-guilty pleasure movies happen to be on Instant Play, thus making my viewing of them totally liberated! No longer do I have to endure those haughty glances from the people at the college library who think they are film critics when I check out Bridget Jones’s Diary! What do they know anyway? They didn’t even have An American in Paris until I asked for it…which I might add, won something like six Oscars, a Golden Globe, and a Writer’s Guild Award in the fifties. Oh, but don’t worry, they have Bridget Jones’s Diary (it didn’t even win a single award in the U.S. guys. Not one).

So here for your viewing pleasure are the 33 movies in my Netflix Instant Queue. Some old, some new, some I’ve seen a million times and some I’ve never seen. I’ll put little asterisks next to the things I’ve seen and a smidge of commentary so that you may indulge your not-so-guilty pleasures too! I understand if you don’t want to wade through the whole list, so to sum it up, I like comedies and movies with no class whatsoever best.  If it’s on the AFI top 100 then I’ll watch it, but I can’t watch really great movies anytime. Tactless, raunchy, weird, funny movies on the other hand, are good all the time.

1.The Office Season 4* -This is a particularly funny season, and I love to see new sides to Michael’s character. My favorite is the Survivorman episode.

2. Superbad* -I’ve seen this about a hundred times, just like everyone else my age and I have to say, it’s hilarious every time. Also, the music is awesome. The Guess Who has gotten more air time than ever since this movie and I still can’t remember any of the words except “These eyes.” I mumble all of the rest of that song and I don’t even feel guilty. ; )

3. The Shawshank Redemption* -So good. Not an any time movie, but definitely one to watch a bunch of times when you are prepared to handle prison rape and a lot of Morgan Freeman.

4. Anchors Aweigh* -Gene Kelly (my pretend boyfriend), Sinatra (an adorable young chap), and Kathryn Grayson (who is just way too pretty and sweet to be real). And the men are dressed like sailors. And they sing and dance. This was also innovative because Kelly dances with a certain cartoon mouse. I am waiting for movie musicals in the classic sense to come back and be awesome, but so far the best we can do is High School Musical…which I am also not ashamed to like.

5. Cabaret* -I’m a sucker for Fosse, and an even bigger sucker for LIZA!!

6. A Streetcar Named Desire* -A good excuse to salivate over Marlon Brando. Plus the acting is pretty rad too. And the screenplay. And the costumes, music, cinematography…etc. etc.

7. Vertigo -One of the few Hitchcock movies I haven’t seen. Like all Hitchcock movies, I’m too afraid to watch it by myself and I know I’ll be unsettled for days when I finally do. Hence my putting it off.

8. Degrassi:The Next Generation Season 3* -I adore Canada and all things that have come from it. I daydream about the day when Kids in the Hall will be on Instant Play.

9. The Diving Bell and the Butterfly -I still haven’t watched this either, but it looked inspiring and was nominated for a few awards, so I thought I’d try it out.

10. Made of Honor -A truly terrible looking film in which some guy falls in love with his best friend and has to be her…maid of honor. It seems silly, tacky, stars Patrick Dempsey, and is right up my alley.

11. Say Anything* -Classic feel good Cameron Crowe. A staple of all female-type John Cusack lovers, it created my unrealistic expectations of men for high school (and after) early on in my life. My favorite character is actually Corey, played by Lili Taylor, who was also in High Fidelity.

12. Grosse Point Blank* -More Cusack. I love him. My dad always really liked this movie ( I think partially because of his crush on Minnie Driver) so it’s a really warm and fuzzy one for me personally. Plus the idea of an assassin going to a high school reunion is comic genius. And there’s Dan Akroyd and Hank Azaria too.

13. Ghostbusters* -No commentary required.

14. Bottle Rocket -I haven’t watched this yet, but I totally buy into the Wes Anderson phenomena and I think Luke Wilson (that’s the brown-haired one right?) is super charming.

15. Best in Show* -You know the first time I saw a Christopher Guest movie I didn’t laugh at all and I stopped watching it. Then I gave it another shot and I couldn’t stop laughing. Since then I love them.

16. Spice World* -I know right?!?! I love this movie. My friends and I used to pretend we were Spice Girls at daycare and I always had to be Posh because I had short brown hair, my red headed friend was always Ginger, my Danish friend was Baby, and my black friend was Scary. None of us were happy with which one we were except the red head, but for some reason we did not debate or try to change around for fear that we would be stuck pretending to be Sporty. This movie is terrible. Terribly fantastic. Oh, yeah and Elvis Costello is in it, which is hilarious.

17. The Parent Trap* -Yes, yes the Lindsay Lohan one. Speaking of Lindsay Lohan, you might be horrified by clicking this link…she’s definitely no Marilyn. Whatever. I like her  crappy movies and I like the Olsen twins ones too. Did you see It Takes Two? Same movie. Except on the one hand we have Dennis Quaid and on the other, Steve Guttenberg. I like both.

18. When in Rome* -Awful Olsen twins movie. I love the cheese, what can I say?

19. Bill Cosby: Himself* -I think for some reason my parents used this comedy special as their entire approach to raising children. I knew every line of this special before I was even old enough to have seen it because my parents really said these things to me. And I turned out well, so  it’s good stuff.

20. Dan in Real Life -Haven’t seen it, but it has Steve Carrell, so I’ll give it  a shot.

21. Smart People* -I actually watched this earlier tonight. It was ok. I tire of Ellen Page after minutes, but she’s super cute. I still love Dennis Quaid for inexplicable reasons. The vocabulary is unbearable and even the title is pretentious, but it’s not a bad movie. I like the idea of it more than the execution.

22. Swingers* -My favorite Vince Vaughn movie by far. Also, this was my first exposure to Jon Favreau and I think he knows my sense of humor exactly. Did you know he directed Elf? He wrote and produced Swingers as well. He’s the kind of man you marry ladies (if he wasn’t already happily married with three kids…)

23. Father of the Bride* -I actually think this movie is terrible, but it reminds me of my friend Kristina who adores it. And I adore Diane Keaton. So it’s like a necessary evil to fall asleep to this movie late at night on occasion.

24. Encino Man* -hahahah Pauly Shore, Sean Astin, and Brendan Fraser. The description of this movie on Netflix includes the sentence, “Link (Brendan Fraser), as the boys have named him, quickly becomes a wild card in the teens’ already zany Southern California lives.” This statement singlehandedly convinced me to add this movie to my queue. It also reminds me of my brother.

25. The Waterboy* -I love that Winkler has a tattoo of Roy Orbison. There are plenty of reasons to like this movie, I don’t think I have to go into them.

26. Degrassi The Next Generation Season 2* -Yep. I love it.

27. A Clockwork Orange* -I have actually only seen this movie once and it was a long time ago, so I put it on here to watch again. All I remember is Kubrick craziness that I was too  young to even begin to comprehend when I watched it, so I’m interested to see it again.

28. Dr. Strangelove* -More Kubrick, but I’ve seen this one a bunch of times. It’s funny, it’s dark, and it’s classic. No real explanation required.

29. 2001: A Space Odyssey* -More Kubrick! Reason enough for me to be afraid of artificial intelligence and aliens all at once.

30. Enchanted* -A modern shot at the movie musical that makes every little girl think back to her Disney days. My Disney days are still going, so I love this movie. It’s also my second Patrick Dempsey movie in the queue.

31. Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story* -I didn’t actually like this movie, but I have only watched it once and I never took it out of my queue in case I decided to give it a second chance. I laughed a little, but it’s no Anchorman or Talladega Nights or any of the other movies along those lines.

32. Spaceballs* -I have never once watched this movie without laughing. It reminds me of my brother and I am a sucker for Mel Brooks.

33. Young Frankenstein* -Did I mention I love Mel Brooks? Another hilarious one from the jokes to the very idea of putting it in black and white instead of color.That Mel Brooks is a genius if you ask me. Something about it also always makes me want to watch Plan 9 From Outer Space?

I promise I’m going to write about other guilty pleasures…

Just after March Madness.

No, I have a quick one for today: Infomercials.

Ok, right I know they are annoying. I also know that the snuggie became a sensation immediately because of its Star-Wars-esque appearance and complete lack of necessity. For whatever reason, we all watch infomercials-could be because they are hilariously stupid, could be the excessive melodramatic over acting, could be because secretly, we really want whatever they are selling.  I really want a Sham Wow and am totally unembarassed by this. I mean granted, you probably don’t need the things these commercials are selling, but if it could make your life a little easier than what’s the harm? They are relatively inexpensive and more trustworthy “As Seen On TV Stores” have popped up everywhere.

The only commercials I am completely overare the Proactiv ones, but this is primarily due to how ridiculously long each commercial is. Also, I have a gagging issue when I see the Pedegg commercials. Is it really necessary for me to watch some lady pour out her dead gross skin foot shavings? I think not. Other than that, any product can hook me and any infomercial can cause me to be comically intrigued into purchasing their item.

In conclusion, my birthday is next month and I would really like a Sham Wow. Ok, thanks see ya then!

I have a problematic new addiction:

It’s called basketball, and it happens to be on tv all the time.

Now, anyone who knows me knows that I am completely incompetent at sports and games that require coordination (Turns out, though, that I play a mean game of HORSE). More importantly, I rarely watch sports on tv. Well, I used to rarely watch sports on tv. Traditionally, I have always watched a little football and baseball and fallen asleep on Sunday afternoons with my dad while we “watch” the race. Don’t judge ok. Racing is an integral part of the high tech redneck family-which is likely what my family would proudly call themselves. So what brought about this change of heart?

I think it all started my freshman year at VCU. Over Spring Break, I went to visit my new best friends in Northern Virginia and turns out one of them loves basketball. He played in high school, keeps up with it on tv, and still plays for fun, etc. etc. So here I am spending my nights with these kids watching basketball at the most crucial point in any Ram’s life to be watching basketball. You got it, we watched Eric Maynor lead our team to victory over Duke. I firmly believe it was all down hill from there. When this basketball fan and I started dating, it seemed the basketball obsession had not fully entered my system. I went to a few games, watched a few on the tube, nothing major. Time wore on and suddenly, this basketball season began. I don’t even know what came over me-it must have been growing for the past few years, but other than that boy, I can’t think of a single person who has watched more basketball games than I have. I know I should be doing other things. I know, but I am rearranging my schedule to  watch games. I don’t go out at night if there’s an important game. Skipping the VCU homecoming game was a big step in our assimilation back to normalcy, but it will only worsen come March. It’s crazy, but I think I can explain it.

Here is why basketball is so super awesome:

1. It’s fast paced. Basketball is the sort of game that makes you remember why they call it a game. It is fun and anything could happen at any second. When you’re actually at a game, you’re afraid to leave your seat because you might miss a ridiculous dunk or a deep three or a crazy block or a foul that turns into a fight. Because it’s so fast paced, it’s high scoring, and your team scoring points is what makes you get pumped in the first place. Not to mention, the other team scoring points will make your heart race and your stomach turn.

2. It’s not hard to follow. I know, nobody understands what all those crazy fouls mean. I still don’t get it right all the time. But here’s the cool part, once you learn a few basic foul calls, how you score, and the little bit of b-ball lingo, you’re good to go. You’ll be talking smack and jumping around yelling in no time!

3. Everyone who plays basketball at  the collegiate or professional level has a ridiculous amount of talent. Basketball players are like virtuosos or something. They have to know how to play with a group but also have an amazing level of personal talent, responsibility, and know how. College basketball is always really fun to watch because they really play defense (unlike the NBA in my opinion), so you get to see them work hard and shine all around. Also, these guys are as tall as one and a half of me. It is crazy to see a person that big jump in the air and smack away a basketball like it’s a crumpled up piece of paper. They are graceful like dancers, quick, and strong. Needless to say, it is hot.

4. I repeat, ANYTHING can happen. I’ll use the CAA as an example, since I follow it most closely. So Northeastern is first place in the conference and were 10-1 in league play. They lost to William and Mary who were 1-10 going into the game. DEAD LAST in the conference. VCU (10-2)  was all tied up for second place and played at UNCW (2-10) only to lose that game. Sure, the standings are pretty much the same. Northeastern still holds first place in the conference and VCU still has a firm grip on second, but the little guy can win here. And the coolest reason why that can happen is:

5. The fans can affect the outcome of the game. That’s right, the fans. That’s you and me. We are the sixth man! I guess it’s true that in any sport there’s a disadvantage to playing away. Particularly in college basketball though, the students are totally willing to go out and support at their team’s home games. This means that the stadiums are packed with school spirit robed in brightly colored t-shirts, face paint, and home made signs. I can’t imagine being the away team at these games. I know the teams learn to deal with the pressure, but it would be so daunting to have thousands of fans screaming in your face every time you step up to the free throw line. This little detail makes it very fun to go to games, support your team (whether they are really great or kinda terrible) and do what you can to make your players believe they can win.

There are about a hundred more reasons, but I think these should suffice for now and convey my point which is this:

Basketball is really, really fun to watch.It would probably be prudent to just leave it at that but I have to say a few more things.

I love watching the NBA because a lot of the players actually like one another. That’s not to say it’s not like that in college, but by the time you’re in the NBA, you’re playing the same guys a lot. They see it as disrespectful to someone they consider a friend to not go out and go hard. That is the coolest thing ever. I love it when they hug before and after the games. I love it when they playfully make fun of each other.It’s nice when they display good sportsmanship…but it’s also awesome when they get in epic brawls. So look out for that too.

I recommend you get started watching now, because March Madness is coming and it will be unstoppable. Also, you probably won’t hear from me again until it’s done. Watch and see.

Did you see Twilight?!?!

I mean for real. Did you? Because if you didn’t, you’re going to want to go do that right now.

Aside from the obvious eye candy, which does make it difficult sometimes to listen to what they are talking about, the movie is good. I mean not good in that Citizen Kane kind of way. I don’t even mean good in that Harry Potter kind of way. It’s not distracting that it’s a movie about vampires the way Harry Potter is a movie about wizards and things. And obviously, it’s not one of the most well-directed, perfectly written, beautiful movies that will change your entire life. But for the first time in a long time, I got completely wrapped up in a movie.

I know, I know. I was hesitant to go see it too. I’m not the sort of person who gets caught up in crazes or becomes obsessed with things by any means. I have never waited in line for hours to see some movie or buy some book that is simply the bees knees. Not because I wouldn’t do those things, but because nothing has ever struck me like that before. Until now.

That’s right. I saw the movie. Twice. And suddenly I was wrapped up in this whole thing. I read all the books in about a day each. I have opinions on which book is the best (the third), which character is my favorite (Alice, duh) and I could write a thesis on why I would pick Jacob over Edward. I know, it’s totally ridiculous. But maybe not.

I’m completely content with my obsession. I realized that for a few days, I was intensely reading instead of watching tv. I realized that I have something to talk to the students I teach and the kids in my mom’s youth group about. Whether you love it or you hate it, Twilight is a hell of a conversation starter.

I was impressed with the movie because I went into it with the lowest expectations. I drifted off into Forks and have only recently drifted back. So I guess where I’m going with this is here: if you didn’t see/read any of these things, give them a shot. You might be surprised at what you find there.

So officially, today’s guilty pleasure (or perhaps more accurately, this entire past month’s guilty pleasure): Twilight

See it/Read it and then don’t be ashamed if you loved it. I know I did.

Because I am completely and utterly exhausted,

I would like to extol the virtues of naps. Now, a lot of people don’t take naps because they feel like they are wasting time or that they’ll wake up more tired than before etc. etc. Well, I will not allow naps to remain the stuff of guilty pleasures!

Today’s not-so-guilty pleasure: NAPS!

Well, I think I should start out by saying that I come from a long line of nappers. My mother used to work at a dentist office with my aunt, and they would all eat lunch quickly (back in the day, I remember going there on days off from school or when I was sick. All of us would watch Days Of Our Lives on this tiny tv…before it got too far fetched) and then they would lay down in one of the dentist chairs. My mom would always come home for work and “rest her eyes for a minute” or “take a cat nap,”  terms that I later realized my Pop Pop said a lot as well. In my mom’s case, we would just turn off the tv and “rest our eyes” for about fifteen minutes so we would be refreshed enough to make and clean up dinner and do whatever else needed to be done that evening. My dad, a notorious napper, has a strategy more like what my brother has grown to accept. At lunch, my dad goes out and lays down in his vehicle for a nap (and listens to conservative talk radio), giving meaning to the term “nodding off.” They do that thing where they sit straight up and close their eyes, but when their heads begin to droop, they sit back up straight again. I believe my father actually learned this from my mother’s mother who often did this, not in it’s natural habitat-the car-but in her rocking chair or arm chair while reading romance novels.

As you can see, I am highly qualified to discuss the virtues of naps. Naps can be rejuvenating. They keep me from getting sick very often, and they help me to be more personable and polite, even when it’s hard to be. When I don’t have time for naps, sometimes I snap at people or argue uncontrollably. My friends can attest to this! In those cases, coffee and a multivitamin will be your bffs. But back to naps. I, myself, take several a week, so let me give you some tips about how to incorporate naps into your life without the guilt of wasting time:

1. Cat naps. Seriously, my mom knows what she’s talking about with these little siestas. Now, you may think just fifteen minutes of napping will make you more tired, but this is not so! If you can get those fifteen minutes, and then immediately get up and start moving around again, fifteen minutes can see you through a few more hours. After a late night, every few hours you can stretch out of the day are a necessity.

2. Set an alarm! Seriously. No matter how much time you have for a nap, you have to set an alarm. If you don’t you probably will oversleep and miss something important. I know you’re thinking, “I have four hours to rest! I’ll be up wayyyy before I need to!” Don’t be so sure. My mom’s alarm of choice is a digital kitchen timer-it takes forever listening to an minute annoying noise to get those things up to an hour, so I wouldn’t worry about taking too long a nap with those guys. I like the old fashioned alarm clock or phone alarm.Do not hit the snooze button! Put the alarm across the room so you have to get up to turn it off, or you will be doomed to skip something important or be late (which I think is worse).

3. Get into something comfy. If you can’t sleep at night with your regular clothes on, then what makes you think you could sleep during the day that way? Get cozy. Take off those shoes and throw on some comfy shorts and a not-so-restrictive t-shirt. You’ll get the most out of even a fifteen minute nap this way. I also recommend avoiding long sleeves and long pants. It’s awful to wake up in the middle of the night sweating and be unable to go back to sleep as a result. It’s even worse during a nap, because you have such a limited amount of time already.

4. Do NOT, I repeat, DO NOT, dawdle when it’s time to get up. Jump out of bed throw your clothes back on and get ready for whatever you have to do next. If you stay in bed or in that comfy chair or on the couch long enough to hit the snooze button or for your alarm to stop beeping, you will not be able to get up, and when you do, you’ll feel exhausted. Trust me on this one.

5. Don’t take a nap if you will not have at least ten minutes to transition back to a waking state before you have to interact with people or go somewhere important. You will be grouchy. You will hate them on principle. You will consider leaving to go back to sleep, and you will probably be rude to at least one person. If you nap with a friend, these rules still apply. Steph and I used to go to her house after school in high school for the sole purpose of taking a nap. We had an unspoken understanding that when it was time to get up, we would merely say, “It’s time to get up,” sleepily smile at the other person, and start preparing ourselves to be normal functioning human beings. Don’t try to have a conversation, because everything they say will bother you and vice versa. Give yourself a little transition time.

6. If you do not have enough time to set an alarm, get comfy, nap a bit, and transition back into society, you have no business taking a nap. Now honestly, I don’t know anyone who doesn’t have a mere thirty minutes out of the day reserved for doing some frivolous thing (i.e. blogging, reading the internets, watching the tube, whatever) which could easily be replaced by a nap. If you don’t have that time, don’t be silly! You don’t have time for a nap. I know our days are jam packed, but maybe if you watch the news or check the interweb while you’re eating lunch, you could set aside a bit of time for a nap on a crazy exhausting day. I have a life. I understand that sometimes napping is impossible. But if you are really tired, your body wants to rest and recuperate, so let it. Like I said, a cup of coffee or tea and a multivitamin will work wonders in this situation. I prefer tea because you can use natural energy enhancers like ginger with a little caffeine and some antioxidants to pump you up pleasantly-read: no jitters.

7. If you can’t sleep, that’s ok! Every time you nap you don’t have to fall into a deep slumber. A quick rest can really recharge your batteries. If I can’t take a great long nap, or if napping for too long will have a negative effect on my nighttime sleep, I like to just lay down comfortably and be still. If meditating helps clear your mind then do that, whatever it takes not to have your thoughts racing about all the things you still have to do that day. A little rest can make the pace of the whole day slower and easier.

Ok, I’ll admit I’m not really an expert. But the people at the National Sleep Foundation are! So if you have any further curiosity about the benefits of naps, you can search “naps” on their website or you can read some of the facts that I have put on the nifty naps page on the tab up top.

And now, aptly, I am going to go grab a bit of shut eye. Until next time, keep napping!